So, with the holiday season well in hand, those that are forced to deal with the public are being subjected to the PWSNBS: People Who Should Not Be Seen.

Please keep in mind I'm only referring to the people who deliberately do not take care of themselves. These are the people who I can smell before I can see them. These are the people who do not take care of their teeth at all. I know that some of you may be eating while reading this post like I normally do, but I've seen people who have such a [this segment of the blog has been sanitized for your protection and happiness], rather than individual teeth.

What is it going to take to get people to think of dental hygiene? I know what it's going to take to make people care about dental hygiene.

FULL CONTACT NAKED FLOSSING. WITH TRADING CARDS.

Everybody on everybody. Mostly oral.



Cause & Effect - The Sunrise EP - Into The Light

7

there is a shortcut to England

Aside from the general no-free-time state of the holidays, one of the other reasons why I haven't posted is because one of the power grids near me blew up. Yes, you heard me. BLEW...UP.

I didn't quite see the cause, but I saw the effect the moment it happened. Billowing black smoke, and flames nearly a hundred feet high. Just to give you an idea of what it looked like: Picture your standard fireplace fire with your gasoline-soaked logs. Now, picture those really, really tall power line towers. (Not the wood ones near the street, the steel grid towers that you see going through empty areas.) And now superimpose that fireplace fire on top of the steel grid towers so that - in your mind - the fires are taller than the towers. That's what it looked like.

The resulting fire burned through 10,000 gallons of oil over the course of 18 + hours (yes, power stations do have oil in them) and covered Beaverton in a blanket of smoke. What's really interesting is that mine wasn't so special, another power station in Portland did exactly the same thing at the same time.

Now, before you look back on my blog posts and make comments about me and heavy weaponry, I would like you to refer to the blog title. Destroying power is not my gig. Using my two Percheron shoes, walking/riding into Portland, drinking coffee until I hallucinate and waking up in some unknown suburb with my Percheron shoes eating a Fred Meyer store - THAT'S my gig.


Razed In Black - Damaged (Disc 2) - Blush v2

7

a tiny white mouse fitted with anti-gravity jets

I know that I don't post a lot, and I'm clearly not posting on other people's blogs. I am the suck.

(THE EVIL GREEN SAUSAGE COMMANDS ME.)

I was recently pulled into a classroom by a policeman who wanted me to point out to the next generation why the mystery man on the video - the one with a chainsaw in both hands - was doing something against the law and was wrong. The answer unto which was - "He didn't have his pinkies extended whilst wielding the chainsaws."

(THE EVIL GREEN SAUSAGE COMPELS ME.)

With that, and my foil - a talking otter by the name of Goofball - I proudly go forth into places I haven't ever gone before. Goofball sort of keeps me on the good side. But even he recognizes that when hoods come near my car with lead pipes that there needs to be some serious thrashing. Ha ha! Sinister plot twist.

(THE EVIL GREEN SAUSAGE POKES ME.)

Now, before you come after me for my apparent disability to distinguish reality from fiction, I should let you know that I didn't set my fists on fire and use them to go after the hoods. That's why my otter has his flying Onionhead turban, and I have chainsaws. Chainsaws with burning alcohol on their incomprehensibly quick rotating bladed chains.

(THE EVIL GREEN SAUSAGE MICROMANAGES ME.)

Now, most people would say that after the crime element has left the immediate zip code, that one should stop wielding the flaming timber implements. But moderation, as Heinlen once said, "...is for monks." And so yay verily, I ground my chainsaws into the asphalt, and raced myself across I-5 down to the Portland Airport, and all the way back to Portland State University. Whereupon both my chainsaws exploded from overuse and the fishes started to go in and out of people's ears.

(THE EVIL GREEN SAUSAGE IS SOMEWHERE ON I-5.)

And, just as my clothes are extinguished by the espresso-wielding college yuppies, I am pulled into a classroom by a policeman who wanted me to point out to the next generation why the mystery man on the video - the one with a chainsaw in both hands - was doing something against the law and was wrong.

Coldplay - X & Y - Talk

7

my cash register is made of rubber

goat



Depeche Mode - Songs Of Faith And Devotion - In Your Room

7

run free with the cabinet speaker on your shoulder

Iff yuoo set oooot Messeec veene-a in feur veezeer, shuoold zeere-a be-a uny theeng theeck in it, it veell be-a ettenooeted by zee nuctoornel eur, und zee smell unffreeendly tu zee nerfes veell gu ooffff: boot, iff feeltreted thruoogh leenee, it veell luse-a its eetire-a flefur. It is ignurunce-a vheech is rooeenuoos, es vhee zee creees ooff hoomuneety beet egeeenst a deeff ier; und ve-a cun teke-a a cumffurt, deneeed tu Cerlyle-a, frum zee fect thet he-a hes mede-a us eveke-a tu oooor suceeel dooties. Fur reeght und vrung ere-a reletife-a. "Type-a need untitype-a." Zee fect thet guudness is best, und thet guudness is nut a stegnunt stete-a boot a prugress, a gredooel reeleezeshun, thuoogh nefer cumplete-a, ooff un inffeenite-a ideel, ooff zee perffecshun ooff Gud by a feenite-a beeeng, necessereely impleees zee cunsceeuoosness ooff seen und ifeel. Oo ye-a feeethffool veetnesses tu my pruceedeengs, Neeght und Deeuna, vhu preseedest oofer seelence-a, vhee zee secret reetes ere-a celebreted: noo, noo be-a present, noo toorn yuoor unger und pooer egeeenst zee huooses ooff oooor eeemeees, vheele-a zee sefege-a veeld beests leee-a heed in zee vuuds, deessulfed in sveet repuse-a; let zee dugs ooff Sooboorra (vheech mey be-a metter ooff reedicoole-a fur ifery body) berk et zee eged pruffleegete-a, bedoobed veet ooeentment, sooch es my hunds nefer mede-a uny mure-a ixqooeesite-a. Zeey cunnut qooeete-a cetch a greet mun in zee mekeeng, nur, ifee by zee help ooff ifulooshun, sey unytheeng veeser ebooot geneeoos thun thet "zee veend blooet vhere-a it leestet." Nu duoobt zee puet's ooptimeesm indeecetes a netife-a stoordeeness ooff heed und heert.



YOU'VE BEEN BORKED!!!


Icehouse - Man Of Colours - Kingdom

7

manchester….the westmidlands….spain….CHINA….HA HA HA HA HA HA HA