the one thing i'm fairly certain about is that i have the full-fledged version of the flu. and that is the part that stinks, because i know this is not the flu season. i am to the point where word capitalization is beyond my capacity to care.

so how does seven deal with this sort of adversity? he goes to the refrig and thinks, "my mouth and nose aren't working, so let's see what we can eat to get them working again." i ate two spoonfuls of minced garlic. two spoonfuls. i couldn't taste a thing. my breath was now melting plastic and i couldn't taste it.

so at this point, i look into the refrig panel, and i see this bottle. this is a well-known bottle. this isn't beer. this isn't mint. this .... is a bottle of liquid pain.

i couldn't feel my mouth or my nose, so i figured - "what the hell. i can't feel anything. except for the pain that is commonly associated with the kill-yourself-because-the-hurt-won't-go-away-under-any-circumstance-flu. i'll try to see how much i can tolerate."

let me give you some background. i call it the bottle of liquid pain, and i eat habenros. the hottest common pepper on the face of the earth. just the tip of a knife of this sauce will be more than enough to spice up an entire mexican casserole.

i pull out a salad spoon from my silverware drawer.

and then i fill the spoon with "dave's total insanity sauce."





and then i put the spoon in my mouth.







over the next five minutes, i did three things.

1) i lost a quarter of my body weight through my nose.
2) i drank a quart of milk.
3) i emptied two boxes of tissues into the garbage.

only numbers 2 and 3 are correct, but 1 felt like a serious possibility. please see the title of this blog to further understand my current state of affairs.

i still can't tell if my breath is now the most offensive chemical weapon since mustard gas. if the impetus to elude my presence based on the flu issue escapes you, then the possibility of my corrosive exhalations should be sufficient.

7

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa*klunk*

Ah, once again I am sick. It looks like a cold with flu-like symptoms. And nothing is better under these circumstances than to watch Peter Sellers destroy everything in his path in the "Pink Panther" series. I have - of course - seen "Dr. Strangelove," thanks to the wonder of Netflicks.

Nothing helps a cold like laughter. So, I sit alone, in my "rheum," enjoying my movies. A bit of trivia - in which installation of the "Pink Panther" series does Peter Sellers vacuum up a parrot, numerous ladies undies, and his own mustache? It's my favorite one out of the whole series, the one where Dreyfus looses it in the end and shoots up the room where Clouseau finally confronts all the villains.

Ah, the humor. I need to be able to rampage around Europe and destroy things. And get away with it, too.

7

de do, de do, de do de do de do deoooooooooo, dedodedodooooo

More and more things and people in the world need to be slathered with butter.

7

shiny happy people WEARING SHINY HAPPY PANTS

Well, I sorta met a half-way point on my little project. Everything I've ever cared for or wanted backed up is on two External Offline Hard Drives (EOHDs). However my PC is fried. I don't even know what the problem is. What once was working is now not working. For no reason.

Don't feel bad at all. I got the most major part done, so not even I am panicking. Heck, I don't feel bad at all. Everything is on an easily accessed, easily transportable medium. However, this means that my awesome sound system is without a source. I had this most massive setup plugged into my computer. Even as I write now, I'm listening to the whole thing - being connected to a Panasonic portable CD player.

Let me back up. There is an incomprehensibly heavy 800+ watt receiver sitting on my floor, with two-foot-tall authentic wood Fisher speakers connected to it with high-fidelity speaker cable. And the whole thing is playing music coming from a portable CD player. Just imagine the picture and how silly the whole thing looks.

I love life's little incongruities. So, anyhow, I'm just writing to let you know that I'm no longer going to let this little project stop me, and I'm officially back.

7

little plastic minion with nunchucks and pepperoni

“Holy twitching crackbabies, Batman! Seven is Darker hasn’t posted for seven days!” One would think that something is up. One could even think that I am dead. But I’m not, I’m just loading a saved game.

The reason why I am embarking upon this endeavor is because at about this point last year, some mal-ware hit my computer very hard. It destroyed everything that had been modified from June to February 2005, and then scattered and corrupted random files that had nothing to do with my operating system. EVEN SINCE THEN, I’M STILL FINDING FILES THAT WERE CORRUPTED FROM THE MAL-WARE ATTACK.

For the most part, everything was backed up. I really only truly lost a few files. Everything had to re-downloaded that wasn’t burned to discs. But that’s the part that I want to be rid of. I have everything backed up over a couple dozen CDs and over a dozen DVDs. And a lot of it is archived. Do you know how hard it is to find a certain file when it’s grouped in with hundreds of others?

It’s painful. So what I’m doing is going through my set of backups and bringing all the files I care about together in one OEHD (Offline-External-Hard-Drive). Just short of my house burning down, this is just as close to the security of a saved game with full health, full armor, full ammo, and right before the big bad ending boss as you can get. I’ve just finished restoring the last (hopefully - last) file that I’ve found to be corrupted.

Hence my lack of presence. But over tonight and tomorrow, I should be finishing the final pieces of my master backup plan. Then we shall REVEL. And REVEL MIGHTILY.

7

morningstar to the face